Archive - May, 2010

Proverbs and Coffee and Case Studies

May 7, 2010 in Discipleship with 0 Comments

I started reading Proverbs again about a week ago. It’s starting to become a habit when I find myself in a difficult situation, and I need wisdom. There isn’t a single proverb that addresses youth ministry, and my husband’s name doesn’t appear once, but there is wisdom in there if you dig. It’s become Step 1 for my “WT…” moments.

This time around I’m not so sure if it’s generating as much wisdom for the situation, or if the situation has been a catalyst to get me into Proverbs. There are pieces of both, but it seems like the big lesson has nothing to do with the gut-wrenching that got me moving.

1:7//The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge, But fools despise wisdom and instruction.

9:8-9//Do not correct a scoffer, lest he hate you; Rebuke a wise man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still wiser; Teach a just man, and he will increase in learning.

10:17//He who keeps instruction is in the way of life, But he who refuses correction goes astray.

12:1//Whoever loves correction loves knowledge, but he who hates correction is stupid.

12:15//The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, But he who heeds counsel is wise.

13:18//Poverty and shame will come to him who disdains correction, But he who regards a rebuke will be honored.

I’m only on Chapter 14, and there are still more examples just in those chapters. 1:5, 3:7, 6:23, 8:17, 8:33, 11:14, 13:1.

Proverbs is the book of wisdom, and we know that wisdom is invaluable. So it’s interesting that at least once in almost every chapter (so far, anyway) God makes it pretty clear that wisdom is connected to my response to correction/instruction/authority.

And that’s an obvious lesson that you wouldn’t really be surprised to learn from reading through Proverbs – because it is so prevalent. I’ve had the added element of some real-life examples in the past week or so, though, that have really been driving the point home.

Just this week I’ve had the privilege, and not-privilege, to watch people respond both ways to instruction/correction, and Holy Spirit has been good enough to point it out. It’s been interesting, to say the very least, and it’s also forcing me to ask,

Which one am I?

Jesus’ Leadership Style

May 6, 2010 in Student Ministry with 2 Comments

Was Jesus – on the earth – a very good listener?

I don’t think He was.

Of course, in one regard, He didn’t really need to be. It’s not like anyone had anything to tell Him that He didn’t already know.

But the transfer of knowledge isn’t the only reason people like to be listened to. You might say it’s not even the primary reason people like to be listened to. People like to be listened to because we like to talk. Because when we have a problem or a bad day it makes us feel better to talk about it. People like sympathy. It makes us feel less alone. It makes us feel valued.

There are all kinds of books and theories and blogs about leadership. There are different strategies and approaches. Many of them make great arguments for talking less and listening more. Many will tell you that, as the leader, you are responsible for keeping people engaged, connected, together, on-task, etc.

I had two conversations in two days last week – one with a youth ministry guru and one with a student – that got me really thinking about Jesus’ leadership style.

Because Jesus told people to follow Him, and then walked away. Jesus told a huge crowd of people, that if they wanted to continue on with Him they had to eat His flesh and drink His blood.

Jesus didn’t compromise His standards when someone wanted to say goodbye to his family, or had a dead relative that needed burying before he could leave home. Jesus didn’t ask open-ended questions to coach someone into discovering the truth or the answer on his/her own.

Neither did His disciples in the early Church. There was no exception made for someone who brought a big offering. They didn’t let each other get comfortable and lazy in their faith. They didn’t even deal with everything themselves. The letters of Paul that make up much of our New Testament are written, in most cases, to correct error.

It seems the leaders proclaimed an uncompromised truth and lead by example, and let the chips fall.

It’s not been an exhaustive study of the New Testament, and I don’t even have any conclusions to draw at present. So help us out:

What do you think? Should we still be modeling Jesus’ leadership style or have times changed? What conclusions could we draw? What would this mean for the western Church?

The Coffee Pot, Part 2

May 4, 2010 in Discipleship, Student Ministry with 1 Comment

I hadn’t intended for there to be a Part 2, but what can I say? I’m blessed beyond measure.

Husband and I do youth ministry, in case you’re new here. Ministry is difficult. From the proverbial pew, I never assumed it was a cakewalk, but I don’t know that I was prepared to answer this call.

There are seasons to it, like every other facet of our faith. There are mountain top moments and valley moments. The past couple weeks have been canyon moments, and one particularly emotionally stressful day broke the camel’s back.

Husband and I went out for lunch and talked and prayed. And that helped tremendously. Husband is getting really good at letting me spew, and still not wavering in speaking scripture back to me.

But still … I got back to the office and he left for Wisconsin and still …

Men and women are different. We think about things differently. We handle situations differently. We respond to our emotions differently. Husband is invaluable. The rest of the people in our church office are wise and theologically intimidating. The other youth pastors in our city that I’ve been able to network and form relationships with are passionate, enthusiastic leaders. They’re also all men.

I sat at my desk for a moment just wanting empathetic prayer support. But it didn’t seem to be there. And then I remembered Jody and Brandi, and I logged into Facebook.

Jody and Brandi are two ladies I don’t even know how I met via the interwebs, BUT they are two beautiful young women who love youth ministry. I typed a vague prayer request and they both responded post haste. I got some much needed prayer support, and we may be on the verge of a really interesting conversation on how to be young women in youth ministry.

Some people would say that you can’t have real community on the internet, and maybe that’s true. But it does help to fill in the gaps. I know that it is only by God’s tender mercies that I am a part of such a great congregation at home, but – as strange as it seems – I’m also so very thankful for the ability to flip open my laptop and take advantage of the body of Christ from Florida to Missouri to Chicago.

Where do you find community and the Church on-line? Leave a link and sing it’s praises in the comments!

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