My high school health teacher was a strange man. I can’t image what it must be like to be the one to discuss emotional and sexual health with teenagers day after day after day … but this guy at least needed a break. I think he permed his hair too.

The guy was often right, is the problem, and it was difficult to take him seriously.

He used to always tell us that you can’t hurt someones feelings. He would argue that you can’t hold a feeling in your hand, so how could you hurt it? You can’t hit it, kick it, stab it, etc.

He was trying to help us understand that our feelings are our own and that no one can hurt us emotionally unless we let them … but trying to explain that to a room full of hormonal high school students was impossible. We argued. We called him names. We withdrew our trust and confidence, and refused to believe a thing he said for the remainder of the semester.

Of course, people can violate others’ emotions. People from the dawn of time have been betrayed by those they trusted and loved, and who should have loved them back. And of course it is unhealthy to try to be an emotional island – keeping people away for fear of ever being hurt. “‘Tis better to have loved and lost than never loved at all.” I agree.

But I was talking with someone yesterday who had experienced a little bit of offense (although said person probably wouldn’t have called it that), and I thought of that health teacher.

Day-to-day, our little “hurt feelings” are probably red flags that we ignore when we blame and accuse someone else’s behavior. If someone says something to me – innocently or maliciously – and my blood pressure spikes, it’s probably because there is something in me that Holy Spirit needs to burn out (and it’s most likely pride).

If I get upset because I feel like someone is being condescending toward me, or because someone doesn’t appreciate me – maybe it’s because I hold myself in too high esteem. If I’m wounded because someone dislikes me for no reason, because a leader doesn’t take my suggestion, or because someone doesn’t trust me – it’s probably my wounded pride.

Or if the “offender” is dead wrong it’s because I’m striving for the approval of man and not God. Either way – it’s me, not you.

Just a thought. Next time someone “makes you” feel a certain way – ask yourself why.

Star 105.5 makes me sad. And not just because the music is bad, or because I know the people I hear singing could be so much more than what they’ve settled for (because those have been my complaints until now).

Dave decided a few months ago that it’s too quiet in the office. Anyone who’s ever been in this office knows – it’s like a library. A really old library in a stuffy north-eastern town. You could hear a pin drop at any given moment, and it’s carpeted wall to wall.

So he brought in this stereo and of course the only thing PC enough (and with clear enough reception) is Star 105.5.

At first it was just irritating. And usually I open iTunes and play Audra Lynn or Hillsong – or I keep a browser window open to YouTube and just keep replaying Jesus Culture videos – loud enough to drown out the best of the ’80s, ’90s and today. But sometimes I’m tired of hearing the same thing.

The past couple days, though, office hours have been bordering on depression again and I couldn’t figure out why (aside from the intermediate stretches of overwhelming boredom). It’s taken me 16 hours of subconsciously analyzing my thought process, but I – at five minutes to the bell – figured it out.

Even though the hit singles are on the other side of the half-wall behind me, and even though I’m not really listening, I’m hearing. I’m hearing a little worldly longing and the occasional heartache, but mostly I’m hearing about summer vacations that will never end and people who have lives supposedly much more exciting than mine. I’m being reminded without paying attention that I want to be a rock star with no responsibilities and lots of money (by rock stars with no responsibilities and lots of money who are mostly very unhappy people).

And I catch myself thinking about how my job is boring or about college or about what could have been if …

When really, I was horribly depressed in college and I know perfectly well that all that could have been if was addiction and torment. Not to mention I have the best husband in the world, the greatest church in the Midwest, a cute new bass guitar, and the primary affections of the One who was and is and is to come.

And maybe you did put on your blue suede shoes and board a plane, but I took up arms over an entire continent last night – and not even the continent I’m on.

It’s strange how the seemingly harmless can be so harmful. How even the subtle implications we don’t notice day after day after day really do impress our minds.

Luke 11:23//He who is not with Me is against Me, and he who does not gather with Me scatters.